Hoarding vs. Frugality

Yesterday on TV I caught part of an episode of Hoarders.  I've heard it said that the general population watches shows like that to make themselves feel better - as if we all hoard but as long as it is not as bad as the people on TV then we don't have a problem.

But as I listened to the hoarders I could hear that they truly saw value in the things they saved.  Obviously to a person with a fully functioning brain it sounds ludicrous that they want to save an item that MIGHT be worth $50 at the risk of losing a house that is worth $50,000.  But the larger point is that people see value in different things.  When I was in fifth grade we did some sort of recycling project and the theme was "One man's trash is another man's treasure."  That idea totally captivated me in fifth grade and has stuck with me ever since.  (That and the correct pronunciation of Arkansas - the embarrassment still lives within me)

A few weeks ago I wrote about making a list of who gets what after I'm gone.  I realize that I'm making an assumption that my descendants will see value in the same things I do.  Like socks.  I kept most of my mother's socks - and wear them regularly.  Not because I can't afford my own socks.  Not because I felt an emotional attachment to them.  I think I am just a naturally frugal person.  But I do have my standards.  If I buy socks, I don't buy them from the discount store because I don't want seconds - I want them to fit well and be comfortable.  I've never bought socks from eBay although I have sold some on eBay and thanked God that I had never been that desperate to have to buy my child's socks second-hand.  One time I had to wear my mother-in-laws socks for some reason.  They were clean but it still made me feel weird.  But wearing my mom's old socks do not make me feel weird, or anything in particular other than dressed and ready to go.  However, who's to say my daughter will feel comfortable wearing my socks.  

I see the value in my ancestor's approach to just asking people what they really want and letting the rest fall out as it may.  If I specify that my daughter get's the entire contents of my closet and she wants none of it - then I've just burdened her with the responsibility and hassle to dispose of it all.  So - I need to stop hoarding my thoughts and just ask them directly, even though it is a difficult question to ask.